I just found my middle name, I hadn't been given
one at birth, and until this moment I hadn't ever wanted one.
Madaline Freedom Weber
I have no possessions that encumber me.
"We are what we repeatedly do, excellence then is not an act, but a habit."
I completed my 8 week basic training in Los Angeles,
back in Arizona, returned on the 18th December.
Being a 'care taker' 24/7 allowed me to witness 'me' from a totally new point of view.
Surrendering every step of the way, allowing Source to guide my every move.
At the time I had been given 'instructions' to leave LA and return to AZ, I hadn't received
clarity on the 'why' of me leaving.
Clarity came Sunday (19th) . . .
Jo-e and Krista needed to have the conversation they had, in the event I had been
there, that conversation wouldn't have happened.
Jo-e is still recovering, it will take a few more months before she can move her
head, until then, she can not drive. (puts a damper on her life)
each year they go to Oregon to visit her family, Krista told Jo-e she would
do anything to make her travels as easy and effortless as possible.
Jo-e was telling me how sweet Krista had presented her 'case'.
My entire body felt like it was going to 'implode'.
I do my best to follow my own advise, “Unsolicited advice is detrimental to my well being.”
in a moment of time, words spilled out of my mouth.
“Jo-e, you say Krista said she would do anything for you, then have her stay home and take care of you.”
there was a 'pregnant pause'
I thought she might tell me to mind my own business, I held my breath.
“I hadn't thought about that!”
feeling the breath be released, I felt her feeling what I just said, feeling how easy it could be,
staying home where everything she needs is at her finger tips.
every one of her friends had voices their opinion, 'don't go'.
As I write this, I don't have the outcome to this situation.
So, all of this lead to a proposal.
I'm calling this:
M A J I X
Jo-e, Cole, Krista and I were following these brave people come forth into a place where they
would alter their lives or die.
To witness the transformation, not only with removing excess weight, altering their view on life.
Altering their entire family, and community.
We would sit and cheer them on. Tears of joy as they would step onto the scale
every pound is a 'victory'.
Are you willing to take on a challenge?
Are you willing to get your family involved, your neighborhood.
Are you willing to alter your entire relationship with food, the way you eat, to what you eat.
Are you willing to 'stop' listening to your mind telling you it's ok to eat that hamburger, fries and a diet coke.
Are you willing to go thru your entire kitchen, clear out everything that doesn't support your new way of being.
We're in our New World, one where everything is possible, you can have anything you desire.
Would you be willing to video you right now, talk to you three months from now, telling yourself
how proud you are, look how beautiful you are, that you didn't give up on yourself.
That when you look in the mirror you see the person that you truly admire and love.
Now the legacy that your' passing onto the next generation is one that is admired.
Get a support team together, don't do this alone, remember,
'the mind is a dangerous place, don't go there alone.'
We can do this. We have the most
extraordinary support ever.
You have my support, you have my desire to be in the trenches as a collective.
What ever it takes, you are what you eat. You know this.
Lets start at the beginning of January. (because I'M NOT done eating Melanie's fantastic cookies)
I look forward to hearing from you, from seeing you.
Blessings, this is the journey we've chosen.
What you will read below is written by daughter Jo-e.
She is a 'health' practitioner.
A question had been asked about the difference between juicing over blending.
I believe I've spoken about 'green drinks'. Jo-e has created.
So here is her response, going in depth about the body, it's functions.
I believe it's important to know what your 'blood' type is, we get what is needed by how we 'feel' after a meal.
For me, when I eat, let say, a piece of fish, steamed veggies, and a salad, my body is really content.
If I add a fourth thing, such as rice of any other grain, my body rebels. I could do grain, veggies and salad.
Keeping it in the triangle.
Also, according to what I've heard about 'raw', that eating 51% raw is optimal way of keeping the body fine tuned.
|Regarding juicing over blending....
" Juicing is one way for the body to absorb carbohydrates, in the form of sugars, while giving the intestines
a much needed vacation.
Nature has provided times of famine which have forced fasting upon our species in,
what I suspect, is not entirely random.
Our industrialized culture has allowed us the luxury or detriment
of a constant food supply.
Human's are built more for famine than feast.... and
It gives the intestines a break while providing carbs to provide the body with some metabolic fuel,
But. usually not, because the body does need fats and proteins for proper body function, so this is a temporary way of being.....
Eventually, the body needs to eat food, and the intestines need to get back to work...
Keeping the intestines cleaned out with fiber and water, are the two most important ingredients to sweep the halls clean,
so to speak.
Blending, instead of juicing provides water and fiber, in droves, along with all the living vitamins, minerals and carbohydrates...
however, juices usually contain more calories in the form of sugar, as it takes larger quantities of fruits and veggies to get its juice out, than blending the whole thing.
The quantity of a blended beverage contains less of the fruit or vegetable because it is whole, and therefore takes up more room en mass....
This provides a more filling drink with less calories, as well as the cleansing fiber qualities and water to move everything through.
I think that Vegan diets are the target diet as far as eating without side effects.
If a food has a side effect, then it is suspect to me, as to whether or not it is worth consuming.
Think of it...
animal and dairy protein has the side effect of possible cancer and causing an overly acidic environment in the blood, leaving the body vulnerable to opportunistic bacterias and virus'.
Colon cancer is strongly linked with animal protein.
The cooking of chicken or meats give off carcinogens and should be labelled cancer causing.
Dairy contains the protein Casein, which has a very bad reputation for being a cancer causing culprit, even more than the flesh of the same animal.
These side effects of foods make me think that even though it is easier to get your protein this way, the question is, at what cost?
Being a healthy vegan is not easy.
Being a vegetarian for a lot of people means eating quesadillas made from white flour tortillas and non organic, factory farmed animal cheeses.
So, the title is less important than the quantity of real, whole, quality vegan food choices.
Like being an orthodox Jew who tried to take on all of the more than 500 laws of Judaism all at once, it is a set up for failure...
Veganism is a lifestyle and thought system that needs to be taken on, one bite at time.
"I predict future happiness for Americans if they can prevent the government from wasting
the labors of the people under the pretense of taking care of them."
Sitting here, feeling the absence of my family, even though I'm still with them. I will be leaving
Los Angeles at first light on the 18th Dec. I've been here for nearly two months.
This has been the most healing, challenging time I've experienced with Jo-e,
one that has altered my reality from where I had been when I arrived.
My life in Arizona is quiet, slow paced, I do what I want, when I want, there's no 'time' clock to guide my moves.
I'm an early riser, love my mornings. So getting up at 6 isn't an issue, making Cole's breakfast, getting his lunch ready, getting him to school by 7:15. slow pace! Out the window. No regrets, being of service is all that Source requires of me, and I am in constant gratitude. . .
I'll share more later, I'm sharing a letter Jo-e wrote to Richard, we haven't met Richard, yet he reached out,
contributed to Jo-e, as so many have, we are forever grateful.
Even though I am leaving, Jo-e won't be able to move her neck for a couple of more months.
She has a 'stable' of fantastic friends that are waiting to take care of her.
She writes from the deep place in her heart. She touches me deeper then anyone ever has.
"It all depends on how we look at things and not on how they are in themselves."
Here is her letter to Richard
well, wow, that is what I have to say.
I am so honored to have had you respond to my Mother's words with actions of generosity and kindness....
You have helped so much to heal an ache in my heart, with a story on it that said, "people don't show up for me."
Imagine the life I have lived with that unconscious undertone.
I have taken on raising my son, my nephew, taken on relationships where I was wife, and partner, chef, maid, taxi driver,
therapist, breadwinner.... the metro woman.... bionic, an island, self generating... EXHAUSTED... and ultimately, no man is an island...
I am not dumb. I have been growing, searching, learning, and still, the tendrils of this feeling have escaped total healing...
These last two surgeries have really taken my livelihood, my body, and my false sense of isolation and independence...
Seriously, for a woman who doesn't like to rely on others, or take from others or be a burden, (all the unconscious reactions of a fearful island girl) I was FORCED to face my mortal needs.
Mom (Madaline) came here to take care of me, as you know if you have been reading her journals, and it has been psycho surgery all around.
So much healing has happened here....
Many of my reactions in life that made me want to be so independent and not be a burden on others were born from my interpretations as a child regarding how I felt cared for, or not, as the case may be.
So, here I was, helpless, my own partner too busy and not really nurturing enough to rely on, and I cried out for my mom...
And she came...
she has given me almost two months of her time.
She has healed me and poured all the love I have ever wanted into me... and given herself to me and read my mind and walked in my shoes, cared for my house, my body, my son, my heart...
then WOW.... we hit some of our old issues that made me not want to be taken care of by her...
and there was a blow out...
Then, there was healing, and awareness
we made a pact... one that made its way through all of time...
and we haven't been the same since.
I wish I could send the whole thing to you in a type of psychic I.V.
but the most important part is not the story...
it's the healing.
It's the necessity of all these events strung together to cause this pressure and its subsequent chemical reactivity and the awareness and clean up and love that has emerged and strengthened as a result.
If all this pain and loss has simply been a vehicle for this healing...
then, I'll take the pain...
I'm still taking it...
It is changing me.
I have been so moved and touched by the incredible outpouring of love and support coming my way....
from people that I know.. from friends that I have never met.
Thank you, dear friend....
For taking this time and your precious resources and following your heart to reach out and give of yourself to me.
I pray that some part of your heart is healed from your participation in my healing and the mass healing happening in my family and friends all around me.
I have been looking for a new way to say thank you....
this is my new way...
I give to you a glowing orb....
it is big and small,
contractible and expandable,
it is transparent, or solid,
it changes colors...
it is yours...
for you to use, to have, to hold and to shift at will....
I hope it translates and doesn't sound as woo woo as ... well as it sounds...
but Thank you's are often like I love you's...
Life is all about having your needs met!
Do you know what your needs are? Make a list, see if you're filling them from your 'heart / soul' space.
Another 'can not' fill your needs. filling them yourself is step ONE.
What does your list look like?
Have you created your list?
Do you come from, 'I'm not good enough' or
'I'm over whelmed already, don't ask me to do one more thing.'or
'I can't do anything right in your eyes, so why bother.'
"I have not ceased being fearful, but I have ceased to let fear control me."
-- Erica Jong
If you don't know what you 'need,' how in the world can your partner fill those needs?
Speak them clearly, speak them so they sound sweet, the tone of voice makes one want to listen, or tune you out.
Your partner 'want's to hear you, so use your voice as if you were speaking to a new born baby.
When you are coming from your heart 'your' voice will sound as sweet as a spring rain.
How do you like to be spoken to?
Speak to another with kindness,
kindness begets kindness.
When you get enmeshed in your story, how can you return to what the true issue is!
Where did your 'needs' go?
Your in this relationship because there was / is 'love' that brought the two of you into this situation.
It IS the foundation, the foundation gets covered up with all the 'stuff' that life presents.
Remove the 'stuff', love reveals itself once again.
"No matter how frustrated you may feel, there is Always a way out. In every situation that arises, we choose to be powerful or powerless. It may not always feel like it, but it is a choice. And there are consequences for these choices in terms of the results we get, and the subsequent increase or decrease in our power and influence. If we choose powerlessness, it is often because we doubt there is any other option."
-- Blaine Lee
In the event you're 'feeling' stressed, take a deep breath, give yourself a time out.
Find that quiet place, reflect on what it is you're 'really' looking for.
When you can speak your 'needs' clearly, approach whom ever your speaking to from your foundation, 'love'...
Are there two here?
"Looking out into the world, everything is happening in that seeing space. To point to your natural state, we use words that describe the absence of something including timelessness, formlessness, silence, non-conceptual awareness, and selflessness. Don't get caught up in the words. They are merely pointing you to this seeing space, the space in which time, form, sound, concepts, self and everything else arises. Simply look at what is here: space, quietness, thoughts arising, feelings being felt, cars going by, birds chirping.
Your life is a dream being projected onto this seeing space by the dualistic mind. When you say, This is an awful day, or My kids are not acting right, the dream is dreaming itself. The mind just plays a game of for or against whatever it sees. By being for or against what is seen, the you illusion stays in place as the center of life. You are continuing to be projected out into this space you call your life. Simple presence reveals everything that needs to be seen. It reveals that you don't have a life. You are life. You are inseparable from this moment, from this space, and from everything that is arising in it. You are inseparable from life. The mind is creating division. It is creating this as opposed to that - you and the world. Beyond this dualistic dream, are there two here?"
-- Scott Kiloby
Life is but a dream.
"People who consider themselves victims of their circumstances will always remain victims
unless they develop a greater vision for their lives."
-- Stedman Graham
“Consciousness is the awareness of being aware”
Ian Xel Lungold
Waking up this morning not ready to get out of bed.
Grandson Cole needs to be at school by 7:15, I knew I needed to get back to Arizona.
Jo-e said, “If you need to go home, I'm so okay, truly!”
in that moment my energy shifted, right now I'm planning to leave
Los Angeles on Friday.
I have a growth on my face, (it's in a crease ) not very visible, its a sebaceous cyst.
Taking one step at a time, following the energy presented,
Jo-e's friend gave her a name of a surgeon, ( I'm shortening this story )
I'm seeing her on Wed, December 1st.
This Doctor is world renown, she is gifting me this appointment.
I'm so very excited.
( Pay it forward )
Friday, it took 20 min. wow, this cyst has been growing for over 10 yrs.
Gone in a heart beat of time.
My plan to leave Los Angeles is Thursday the 9th Dec.
the stitches will be removed on Wed.
Jo-e's gets stronger daily, she has a titanium plate and eight screws in her neck,
She can not , Bend, Lift or Tilt.
When I heard the doctor say;
“No B.L.T.” I laughed.
We go to see him on Tuesday, so until she can drive, she's dependent on others to take care of Cole,
and most everything else.
So, we'll see how it goes, whether I leave on Thursday or not.
'Ride the tide of change'
that's my motto
This is the 2nd night at my sisters, my niece and her husband sold there home
and hadn't found a new one, so they've been living with my sister, (her mom )
it's been amazing for them to be living with one another as adults.
My niece is 46, hasn't lived at home for 26 yrs.
Talking about 'needs' and not having them met.
Seeing how different 'D' and I are, how uniquely she speaks.
How do I say this???
I live from one place, LOVE, I don't say that litely.
( litely aka lightly)
I have peace of mind, my contentment permeates everywhere,
I feel joy in all that I participate with, even being tired, all of my
experiences are blessed, when I walk, I thank the green lights.
Being I just completed my 68 rotation around the sun,
I FEEL DIFFERENT!
Not sure how to describe 'different' . . .
my description of anything from the past is,
“some yesterdays ago.” mw
being this 'time' thing has gotten where . . .
'it doesn't matter'
So, “some yesterdays ago,” I felt I needed to speak about how
spiritual I was, what I was reading, what guru I went to see,
oh how enlightened I was, so smug.
I find myself being quiet now, listening, being the observer.
This is my movie, I'm enjoying it, sure hope you're enjoying
the movie you're creating. If not, write a new one.
What are you listening to?
What do you do with what you are hearing?
Who's the boss any way?
Meditation Mount Ojai California