Matty's Journal
December 2006

 

2nd Dec. ‘06

 

Cottonwood AZ , what a sweet little town, probably how Sedona was 50 yrs ago.  I’m living right between Cottonwood and Sedona.  Loving the peacefulness of this place.

 

There’s a yearly event, called  The Chocolate Walk”.  All the shops are open until
8 pm . They have their favorite chocolate that is given to those whom have bought a ticket.  I have a new friend, Patricia, she’s a beautiful angel, who paints angels, her gallery feels as though I’m walking on a cloud where all the angelic beings are gathering.

 

A friend, Ayande had introduced me to her, we asked if we could set up outside her gallery, she was thrilled. I made more Majix Broom, and baskets

with the peacock feathers, the energy from them is amazing, especially the Majix Broom being the crystals, stones, leather and feathers have Mother Earths properties.

 

Having my  ‘FREE HUGS’ sign, we brought music outside, finding myself dancing to the rhythm of the songs, holding my sign, watching people pass by, some would come over to receive hugs, while other’s  would walk by averting me all together. It’s so fascinating.

 

The first women, {about my age} came over for a hug, feeling her body convulse, hearing her cry, I held onto her, she continued to weep telling me she lost her friend yesterday, I held her, she said, “he was more a brother.” I held her,   I heard, “Tell her I’m pain free, and happy, that I’m always here, and when ever she want to talk with me, tell her to put her left hand on her right shoulder, I will be listening.”  While being in my arms, I told her what he said, she wept more. I held her. When we stepped away from the hug, she told me he had been in a great deal of pain, so, in truth, this is a blessing, no more pain.

 

I must have hugged 50 + people, fantastic.  A young boy, maybe 7 years old came over, “I want a hug.”  My heart melted.  We hugged, he said, “Thank You.”  With a huge smile on his face.  A few moments after, a young women walked over, saying, “that was my son, when he told me he needed to go over to that lady and get a hug, I cried.”  She proceeded to walk into my arms.

It doesn’t get any better than this.  One lady told me I was an angel, a man said, “when can we get married,”  I said, “day after tomorrow,” he wanted to know why so long, I told him I needed to get a dress. He laughed saying, “I live in Cornville, you look great.”  I was wearing jeans with more patches then jean.  It was the absolute with out a doubt best night.

 

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

5th Dec. ’06          6 / Road

            

           R E D              L I G H T

 

Running out of gas?  Seat Belt sign flashing.

Oil Low,  Flat Tire. . . Dead Battery . . .   

 

Wonderful to have these signals reminding the owner something needs your attention.  Curve ahead, slow down, traffic jam.

 

           

           T R A N S I T I O N

 

Body Hurts, Eyes Blurry,  Heart Thumping. . .

 

Can’t stop,  ‘They need me at the  _________’

{office, shop, bakery.  You fill the blank in.}

Gotta get the kids to school.

When will I  have a moment for ME?

 

         S T O P !

 

Are you taking better care of your car than you are

            Y O U?

 

Make a list of the most important people in your life.

Who’s name is first on your list?

 

A few week’s before Ian passed, he said,

 “Why do you think I chose this one?”

Answer,  would you have listened any other way?”

He said, “No, most likely I wouldn’t have.”

 

What will it take for you to stop and smell the roses?

Reading stories of people whom have passed, yet have been

Revived, they take on an entirely new point of view for them~

selves, taking care of themselves first.

What will it take for the collective US, you and me to wake the

masses up so we can glide into the ‘ New World ’ with ‘Grace and Ease’


11 December 2006    

12 / Flint

 

Ethics and the boldfaced truth are the order of this day. Also called, the day of Mirror
-
falsehoods are unmercifully cut away by the sword of truth.  Swing it wisely for this

sword has two edges.  Those that expose the truth are fully expected to bear that truth out.


Thirty three years ago today my brother passed away, he would have been seventy one.  Amazing how my life changed in that moment of time,
the time between breaths,  the time when my life stood still.  It only took a nanosecond for that last breath, from being in this 3D world to another space and no time. 

 

I’ve heard and spoken, “when you change one thing, you change everything.”

Thinking about what my life might have looked like in the event my brother hadn’t died.  The family owned a bakery, we worked there, our collective energy had  Weby’s  be a land mark in Studio City , California .  We wanted to use our family name, we were told because there is a commercial bakery with the name Weber, we couldn’t use that.  My brother, {Edward, Eddy}  Eddy came up with Weby’s, I loved that name, there were people that would call my dad, Mr. Weby.  Cute. 

 

Eddy’s death altered our reality around every breath that was taken, my parents were never the same.  Loosing their only son. The eldest.  Daddy wanted to give the bakery to me and my sister.  I asked daddy if he really wanted to retire, he said, yes, I said, “then, sell the bakery, I’m not a baker, neither is ‘D’,  sell her Daddy, enjoy the rest of your life with mom.”  That’s what he did. I have no regrets about that. 

 

Daddy passed away ten years after Eddy,  Momma passed away in ’97.

While walking through the ‘ Enchanted Forest ’ this morning, feeling my brother, there’s an uncanny sensation around his life from me, while I view my emotions, at times its as though my memory of him is a movie that I know, yet can’t remember it in it’s entirety , an illusion, looking for words to describe what feelings were filtering through my body, I noticed that the ‘ Enchanted Forest ’ felt different, speaking out loud to the elementals,  “Do you look different, or is my view of you different, am I different?  That one rang true,  I’m not who I was yesterday, nor the moment before, each breath brings an entirely exciting point of view.  There’s a shiver that runs from the base of my spine to my crown.  The sensation feels as though a current of electric energy got plugged in.  ok, so, then this:

 

Yesterday, I had a clear view of what I hadn’t said to my house mate, being I view myself as a powerful communicator, I knew it was something that had to come out, thinking about talking with a girl friend, puking this stuff out so that the old record, the 45 RPM could find a new groove,  {if you don’t know what a 45 is, ask someone older then you} the needle was stuck. Ultimately, what I came to was to talk with him, say what was there so that neither one of us has to tip tow around. How I was going to approach this issue was to speak to him as if I were speaking to my girl friend about him.  {speaking behind one’s back is a no no,} when he returned from doing his errands, I said I wanted to share thoughts, and that how I come to what I was to tell him came from many hours of self dialog, the most comfortable way for me to share what I want to say is to have it that I am telling my girl friend about you, that the complaints need to be on the table so that however our relationship moves its got a clean plate.  He said, ok, I’m listening.  The details aren’t important, it’s the outcome. First, I commend him for listening without interruption,  very commendable. Thank you for that.  When I was finished speaking, he asked if there was anything else.

 

I asked him if he wanted to share what was going on while listening to me, or did he want to wait, think about it and get back to me.  He said he wanted to digest it all.  Good, very good.

 

What happened in my body after sharing this with him, well, I physically relaxed, I hadn’t even noticed that I hadn’t been relaxed until my body relaxed.  Pretty trippy, that’s how it shows up for me. My body is an amazing barometer.  I love it.

 

I woke  at 5:30am , fully rested, 6 straight hours of sleep, I can’t remember the last time I had a peaceful night sleep.  So, I’m contributing my being clear with him, speaking what’s there for me, also saying, “this isn’t for you to change, this is for me to be clear with me, and you’re my mirror.”

 

Being I don’t hold secrets, there are times I ask myself why he wants to live with me, he’s not my lover, I’ve made that clear.  Yet, this is where he chooses to be,  god bless him.

 

                                    M A G I C    H A P P I N S

 

On the 6th Dec. just a few days ago, Gary and I were talking about this place,

where we’re living, and the Feng Shui with in this structure, he was saying the energy in my bedroom is called the ‘Disaster Star’  . is there a remedy? Not really, we’ve already put more then 70lbs of metal in there. Ok, then it’s time to move.  I called my friend who moved to Cottonwood about two months ago, the guy that owns his house, owns other property’s, I asked him to find out if John had a house for me, an hour later, he called to say that John bought the house across the street, and escrow would close on the 12th, and you can have it.  Gary and I drove over, {I had met John during the summer when the farmers had their market, he loved to hug me, I loved to hug him.}  anyway, three hours after the decision was made to move, I shook Johns hand, it was a done deal.  Talk about instant manifestation. 

 

                                Ask, and ye shall receive. 

 

Well, I’m askin’ and I’ll continue to do so.  By the end of Dec. we’ll be moving to Cottonwood .  Yeah.  I love it there, reminds me of Venice California when I first moved there in the early 80’s. . .   fun, quaint, friendly, and the new place is walking distance to old town. 

 

My Majix Broom is being displayed in uptown Sedona, the shop if filled with Crystals , rocks, stones, so the Peacocks feathers show and are selling, Yeah, I get to pay the rent. What a hoot.

 

For our beautiful family that are now wearing the Galactic Butterfly, And the experiences you’re having.   BIG WOW I’ve made a file of everyone’s  letters, and  if it’s ok with you, I want To put them together and make it available for the rest of the family to read.  If you don’t want your name attached, that’s fine. Let me know.

I love you guys,  my heart is singing,  Ian just said,

 

 “It couldn’t have happened any other way.  GIANT  THANK YOU,”

 

BLESSINGS, LOVE, GRADITUDE, COMPASSION, HUGS, ALL OF IT.

                               IN  LAK’ECH

 


NEW UPDATE 5 / Seed

 

Today is about dynamic activity, and sexuality.

Here is the germination of ideas whose time has come.

Abundance is gathered as with a fisherman’s net today.

 

Freedom from past patterns or traps can be achieved.

Remember, you hold a net that works.

 

 

Ok, so, I’m holding the net, so, why do I feel as though my entire live is totally discombobulated?  Where did my center go?  There are days when I can’t seem to find a peaceful place within?  I know the rollercoaster is running on a track, yet, I can’t seem to find that track.  It’s as though the road is breaking up in front of me, with each step there’s a crack, and finding my footing is challenging all of my ability’s.  Where do I go from here? When will ‘this net’ allow me to stay in a place where my soul finds the comfort that I know is waiting, yet, not.

 

 {Now, that was some good writing, needing drama? Sure know how to find it, I believe we all know how to create drama in life.}

 

There was a time in my early thirty’s when I felt as though the only safe place for me would be in a home where others took care of me, where I didn’t need to do ANYTHING, I felt insane at times, I would envision myself on top of a hill, in a home that was run by kind people, this home was an old English Country  home, rolling hills, huge trees, lounge’s, comfortable, there was so much care given to every detail.  I didn’t have to speak if I chose not to,  no one bothered me,  it was the only place I felt calm in my skin, I went there often in my dream world.  I haven’t visited there for some time. 

 

I know our New World will be like that, content, where those who choose to participate can, those who choose to sit in their silence can, no one will ask anything of you, and if they do, you have the choice to participate or not, and what ever choice you make is the perfect one.

 

 

 

Khabil Gibran said:  “The true wealth of a human being is the good he performs in the world.  Beauty is eternity looking at itself in the mirror.

But you are eternity and you are the mirror.”

 

I’m not complaining, I’m looking at what there is, what I’m feeling, how it shows itself to me.  Maybe, just maybe finding a happy place in-between.

 

By feeling all these emotions, I know I’m alive, I’m breathing, only in this body can I ‘feel’,  Ian can not feel, he can remember how he felt when he was in his body, yet, being in his light body, only the word feel is there, not the sensations that can be felt with in this   3D  world. 

Those in their light body can live vicariously through us, they can’t be me, or you.  They can be excited, yet can’t feel ‘excited’, they can know  love,  yet can’t, ‘ feel love’. . . 

 

Step by step, breath by breath, eyes open, heart exposed, there are times when I feel as though my heart will explode. 

 

A lady asked me a question the other day,, “what is the favorite part of your life?”   waking up each morning.”  She shook her head, smiled, gave me a thumbs up,  see ya.”  I walked out the door.  

 

 

 

6 / Serpent

 

Today is my Mayan Birthday. . .

 

Feels good, strange at the same time, following the energy of each day, giving me what is given, not questioning any of it, accepting it all, being with it, allowing it, honoring it, loving it, that’s it.

 

What I’ve noticed about ‘Yellow’ days, being Yellow / Red is about ‘surprise and mystery’. . . yesterday, being a Seed day, yellow, each moment had shown up with an entirely new emotion, there’s magic about it all, and knowing that from this clear prospective, all there is, is to pay close attention, and allow all that comes to be in ‘this divine’ order.

 

      Finding order is a tidy way of experiencing each days energy. 

 

 

 

8 / Deer

 

Deer   /   Manik

 

Handiness with all kinds of tools and a peaceful, generous, cooperative energy flows today.  This is a great day for service to your community.  Quality of work will be most important and appreciated by others.

 

                                         ‘I Am     Me’   . . .

 

I Am the writer, director, and ultimately, the performer. 

What I write each day consist of Love, Love, Love, Ethics,

Compassion, Gratitude,

Passing judgment on my OWN writing, well, I would look at that

as insanity. 

 

The ‘script’ for today consisted of weeping, {in the 3D world} I describe the emotions as ‘ripping my heart out’  with pain that has no end.  Speaking to Ian, being angry that he left, transferring the tears to a place where feeling the lose traveled through my body like a bold of lighting. 

What I know about being in this body is, without it, I couldn’t FEEL, emotions are ONLY available in THIS human body. Spirit world, {Ian} can remember the word while in his body, that’s what’s available, the FEELINGS are no longer a part of his reality.   he will use word, ‘SAD’  , yet

In the light body he’s in, ‘sad’ the FEELING is gone.

 

I’m SOOO grateful for having this available at this time, NO JUDGMENT,

would you tell God,  “OH, no thank you God, I don’t want THAT gift, can you give me another.?”  WHO WROTE THAT INTO YOUR SCRIPT???

 

                                              Stop complaining! 

 

Two contractors who had been working together for some time, sat down for their lunch break, each day, they would sit, each day, they dug into their lunch box, the one would say, “Peanut Butter again” his agitation was clear by the expression he used.  His friend said, “why don’t you ask your wife to make something else for you?”  “Oh, I’m not married.!

 

Hello, knock, knock,               who’s there?                       Nobody.

 

 

Leah called,  are you crying?”   Yes,   “Do you want to talk about it?”

 

{Leah’s husband passed away 5 years ago.}  she told me, “the feeling of lose never goes away, it’s not as intense, yet it doesn’t go away.”

                                             That’s comforting.  Wrong.

 

Our little family was meeting tonight, under the tree, around the fire.

Leah wanted to know If I were going to be there.         Yes. 

 

Around 3 pm. all the tears stopped.  Gathered all the emotions from the day, blessing it, acknowledging how fantastic my body felt.  By the time we got to the fire, everything from the day had been washed off in the shower.

 

Leah and I hugged for a long time, two, maybe three minutes. I felt her melting into me, and her feeling the same.  Being with one another, I hugged John,  Almon, Ayande. With each hug, the energy we share is not described with any words I have.  

 

 Have you ever found words that could describe your emotions the first time you felt love?

 

 

9 / Star        Lamat

 

Star, is a day of great abundance that should be shared in all  directions.

Another name for the day is  RABBIT,  which is very energetic, busy and playful.  Today is best spent like a star that gives light in all directions to all relations.  Be cautious of strong opinions that you think are right.

 

 

The temperature most mornings these days have been around 20o.  this morning it didn’t make it to 20, it was 17o. 

My morning consist of having my prayer glass of lemon water, coffee, then my walk into the woods with Spirit, Maxie, and most of the time Gary ,

 

The path is covered with wood chips, soft to walk on. Yet these past few days, they’re covered with ice,  yesterday my fingers and toes felt frozen.

Today, I knew they were frozen, I felt pain, I walked faster to get home. I told Gary I had to lie down.  He asked if he could bring me anything, I asked for a cloth rung out with very hot water, he did, I wrapped my hands in the cloth,  within moments I had turned that cloth cold.  Gary held my toes, rubbing them, getting the circulation back into them.  Tooo trippy.

 

We took a short walk, just to the bridge, half as far as ‘normal’ 

Returning, I recognized that my ‘chant’ was  ‘my fingers and toes are freezing.’   That’s real cleaver.     I started putting in warmth, heat, fire, visualizing the fire from last night.  Then I slipped back into my fingers being frozen.  Ok, this isn’t working, what else?    

 

This is the chant that came,  I know you’re reading the words, yet, when it was coming out, there is a sing song beat to it.

 

I Am                Me,

I Am               Me,

I Am              Me

 

I am the sun,          the earth,

I am the leaf           and the branch,

 

I am the stone beneath my feet,

I am the moon that lights my way.

 

I Am               Me,

I Am              Me,

I Am             Me.

 

I find my way, I always have, you

Guide the path, create my life,

 

You are my joy, my shinning light,

We share such love, right here this night.

 

I continue to find other words, it eased

the discomfort, yet my fingers were still

frozen.  

 

 

Well we’re getting closer to our move to Cottonwood , we’ll be there

By the end of Dec.  

While going through ‘stuff’ I came across a few pages that Ian had written.

 

This is what he said;

 

“Reasons come after or as an effect of an event.

 

Events need no reason to occur.  Once there we create a reason out of all possibility, we wall in creation with a logical reason or theory of how something happened.  All of this reason is manufactured by the mind.  The accepted and familiar patterns in our reality are comfortable explained and nothing much else “really” exists to most humans.

 

These truths are coming forward to everyone just like  NO  WMD in Iraq

Our  minds and the Matrix programming of pattern sets are showing themselves in all parts of our reality.  That’s where your extra ESP, telepathy is coming from.  .every thing, and all connections from CAUSE to EFFECT, are becoming transparent to our consciousness.  It has been the reasoning  mind that lifted consciousness from a Tribal Life form to our current state in Evolution.

 

The Mind has worked exactly like a ladder.  You would not want to step off the ladder until you had reached the next level or floor would you?  Here we are at the top rung of the ladder, swaying in the breeze, as we decide to step off of the ladder into a new reality of pure potential, yeah, this is big stuff!”

 

There’s no date of these pages, yet, I would say he wrote them in ’04.

 

 

One more, this one is short;

 

“The Mind considers dragging elements of the past into your future until you make a decision.  Once you have made a choice, the mind is suspended for a time while you spend some time just knowing what you will do.  Then after some more time the mind starts dragging parts of your past into what might be your future considering your latest choice.  An incessant process.”

 

 

Well my beloved family, walk tall, walk in LOVE, ethics is where we stand, knowing that this is our birth right.




                                  MY DEAREST CHILD;
 
You are the miracle you have been seeking,
you are the Heart you want to find,
you are God's gift to the world
you have been crated as Divine
you are my heart, I am yours
There is nothing between the two
you are my beloved child
my gift to you  .  .  .   is you!
 
           Mother Mary



Please check out Fred's latest creation.
He was a good friend of Ian's and is a fine artist / jeweler.


Intrinity

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Matty

Matty at the Page Springs Peacock Ranch



baby Peahen

 

New Arrival - Baby Peahen

 
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