November 28th
12 / Serpent
The clouds are grey, ominous, sounds of thunder overhead as
we {Spirit, Maxie and I} left the house for our morning walk.
Before we left I had a talk with Spirit, telling him he must
walk with me, that he either listened, or he would be put on his leash. He was angry that I left him, gone for 6 days visiting my
family for Thanksgiving and my grandsons 13th birthday, and my
birthday. I needed to be with my family,
in the past he would come with, this time he stayed with
Gary
,
he’s fond of him, and
Gary
loves
him very much.
Thinking about the days energy, 12, understanding, also, Ian’s Mayan
birthday is 12 / Sun, my Mayan birthday
is 6 / Serpent, When ever our energies would meld, {in the past} I would
feel a deeper connection, a power that crept into my being in a way that on
other days would wash over me with a contentment, a feel good sensation that
would have me smile, have the entire universe dance, sing, and play a happy
tune.Today, the energy brought this enormous fuel of power that I
wasn’t sure what was going on inside my body.
Walking between the fence into ‘my enchanted forest’ taking
in the love
the forest offers me, speaking to the elementals, thanking them for
their love. Very seldom do we come across anyone else on the trail. This
morning there was a women and her dog, she had her dog on a leash, Maxie and
Spirit wanted to play, She held her dog, saying, “NO, NO” grabbing Spirit and Maxie
by the collar, my heart started racing, Spirit being 130 lbs, and Maxie, maybe
70, neither one liked being held that way. We made it around the women, and
continued our walk, I found myself welling up with a deeper emotion than when I
started out. Feeling the tears well up, feeling them run down my cheeks. Walking faster, then faster still, the burning in my calf’s
let me know I was alive, I walked faster, the tears
were burning my eyes.
I wanted to scream, feeling the frustration welling up
within.
Inside I was screaming at Ian, will this ever stop?
I had three layers of clothes on; it’s cold, under 40o. Feeling the sweat covering my face. My round trip walk takes about 45 min,
sometimes longer, today was a longer one, when returning I slowed down my pace.
A cold breeze ran over my face, cooling me down, saying “thank you” . . . tears continue to flow, I’ve given up
looking for reasons, don’t care about reasons, feeling
the emotions, knowing that this is the only place that emotions can be
felt. A lone rain drop fell, landing on
the outside of my right eye, knowing Ian was weeping with me. I so love you Ian, Please come back,
please.
God has not called us to see through one another, but to see
one another through.
I know that God doesn’t give me anything I can’t handle.
There have been times when I would want to debate that, now I know, deep
within, that EVERYTHING that is being given to me is a gift. Would you refuse a gift from God? What a foolish question, yet, look what
happens when your in fear, or angry, it’s because ‘this’ gift is not
accepted. Accept the gift, and you’re a
peace.
God never places a burden upon shoulders unfit to carry it.
Larry Eisenberg said, “For peace of mind, we need to resign
as general manager of the universe.”
Time to let go, let God do the work.
While in LA, walking with daughter Jo~e, we passed a young
man that was walking towards us, he was dragging his leg, and the right side of
his body couldn’t stand straight. Jo~e
said, “there by
the grace of God go I.” “Jo~e” she turned towards me, I said, “about four
days ago, while on my morning walk, that thought came to me, I looked closer to
those words, thinking about how I view
my life ‘today’, I’ve changed the phrase
to, ‘There by the grace of God, there I am.’ ” she shook her head, “yes, yes, there by the grace of God, that is
me.” While passing this young man, we
said, hello, he smiled, he said, hello.
Sometimes I feel befuddled, I smile at everyone, there are
times when passing by another on the street, or in a shop, and that person has
their head down. What is that? Afraid of
contact, afraid that another would take something from them, what?
Free Hugs. There’s a
healing center here, on their building they’ve put up a sign, FREE HUGS. I love that. I carry my Free hugs sign in the trunk of my car. I never know when I
want to pull it out, its amazing how I can read a person by the way they will
allow themselves to melt into me. Easier
read then one’s palm.
16th Nov. ‘06
Wanting to say something about Ian, about
this entire year.
Walking way from my computer, asking Ian
what to say.
“what do you want me to say
Ian? Help me out here.”
This is what I heard, I’m not going to explain, or make
sense of any of this, I, Matty, aka Madaline have a request,
ON
THE EVENING OF THE 16TH, AT
6 PM
.
{wherever you are, doesn’t matter about what time zone.}
LIGHT A WHITE CANDLE,
SIT QUIET FOR A FEW MOMENTS, SEND, WHATEVER FEELS RIGHT, SEND THAT.
What
ever experiences you have, please share them with me, I love hearing from you. matty@mayanmajix.com
Blessings, In Lak’ech to all, I couldn’t have done this with out you,
There’s
only one of us out there.
Truth reveals itself when the heart is still,
I’m hearing a tale that can’t be told,
Sitting under my hat, it’s tendency
is growing old.
There are words a plenty, that I know, waiting for
The moment to let it all go.
Can you listen, can you see, can you find your way to me?
The path is clear, your energy is near, there is nothing to fear
Light a candle one by one, make a
wish and it will be done.
Close your eyes and think of me,
I’m with you always, and in all~ways. . .
Sunday, the 22nd of October ’06
,
My car was packed the night before, I’m leavin for
Los Angeles
in the morning. The sun hadn’t come up, it was around 6 am,
great time to travel, Sunday, no one on the road, energy is quiet, pleasurable,
cool air, crispness biting into my face, yeah,, ,
I’m excited, my daughter is getting married on the 28th, Donnie is a breath of fresh air, fantastic addition to
our family.
I love driving alone, listening to my thoughts, singing,
humming along with the angles, it’s the best.
Once in a while I’ll turn the radio on, came upon an interview
about coco, there was a study made with
107 men over a 15 year period of time, these men drank a cup or more of coco
every day. At the end of the 15 years, every single one of them remained
healthy, no heart problems, no liver problems, no problems. There’s a tribe, {sorry was driving so I
didn’t write the name of the tribe down.} that drink any where from one to four
cups of coco a day, they never ever have heard of heart problems, or any other
organ problems. Yet when one would leave
the village and adventure into a large city, taking on a new way of living,
they also took on heart problems, and all else that we’re so open to
experience. This coco didn’t have sugar in it, it’s in pure form. Wish I had more info for you, this blend was mixed with green tea. Can’t buy it at a store yet.
Knowing there are so many avenues that we haven’t been privy
to, yet we’re getting what we need, when we need it.
When I arrived at my daughters, she was working, her girl
friend was there, we chatted, I went on errands with
her, good to catch up. The next day was a blur. Other than having my hair cute.
Tuesday, Kelly, daughter who’s getting married, {she lives in
Chicago
} was coming in, Jo~e and I were picking
her up around
3pm
.
The morning was very interesting, I had a date to meet Ea,
{brother Ea lives in
Mexico
, the stone carvings that are posted are
his} we made plans to meet at the Broadway Deli on the corner or 3rd and Broadway, in
Santa Monica
at 10 am. Jo~e was a work, so I was alone in her apartment. It was
9:20
, I decided to take my book, get there
early and read, it’s a fun people place.
Anyway, got into my car, no deal, no start,
battery dead. Ok, I hear the voice, ‘walk’, it’s 25 blocks,
beautiful warm day, high 70’s, Jo~e’s shop is on 11th and Broadway,
so I was going to get the key from her, being now that I was on the outside of
the door, there I stood. It’s all divine.
Walking into her shop, we hugged, telling her about the
battery being dead, getting the key, she asks me if I want to take her car,
“No, it’s only another 8 blocks.” I’m
approaching 8th street, the
traffic light just turned red, there’s a beautiful goddess waiting on the other
corner, I turn to say good morning, at the same time my toe catches a crack in
the sidewalk, I’m down, hit my left knee hard, I must of passed out for a
moment because when I opened my eyes, I was on my back with my water bottle
under my head, by the grace of god, the water bottle saved me from hitting my
head on the pavement. She comes over,
saying, “I don’t like the way your head is, can I put your bag under your
head?” “Yes.” Then, another goddess shows up, I’ve got one
holding my right hand, another holding my left, I hear a male voice, “I’ve
already called the fire department.” I heard panic in his voice, looking up at
the sky, there were white billowy clouds, it was amazing, the man was dressed
to the nines, beautiful, the goddess holding my left hand asked me if I were
alright, smiling I said, “no, I think if I were alright, I wouldn’t be lying on
the sidewalk.” Then I hear her say, “Oh my goodness, is
he gorgeous.” “So, I have to fall in
order to meet a beautiful fireman.” We laughed. They wanted to take me to the emergency, I tapped my wrist as if I were wearing
a watch, saying I’m fine, and I have someone waiting for me.
I was able to bend my leg, I really felt fine, they helped ,me up, I went over to the goddess who was holding my
left hand, we hugged, the fireman said, “wow, do you feel that energy.” Cool. I hugged them all, they wanted to take me, to get checked out, I wouldn’t go, way to stubborn.
The knees on my jeans were dirty, the side of me also, I said,
well, this is how I’ll be seen. The
other fireman said, “well, you sure don’t look like
one of the homeless.” {funny joke, at least I think its funny, when you date a
homeless person, at least you can drop them off anywhere.} I heard that in a movie.
Got to the deli 20 after. It was a good meeting. Later daughter Jo~e
picked me up to go to the airport. I relayed the story to her, all she could do was shake her head. We
park at LAX. Walk into the terminal, she brought some food, “Are you hungry?” I could eat I tell her, she hands me a set of
chop sticks, she had gotten rice noodles and veggies, I hadn’t noticed that my
arm wasn’t working well, I couldn’t handle the chop sticks, and I couldn’t
bring my arm up to my mouth, we laughed so hard,
When we returned to the apartment Jo~e gave me something to
relax my muscles. This is good, being I don’t take anything, yet, I’m open.
When I contacted sister in Hawaii, telling her what happened,
she and Ian worked on my, by the 3rd day, all the tension was gone,
the discoloration was gone, everything was put back to normal .
Need help?
"Asking for help doesn’t mean that we are
weak or incompetent. It usually indicates an advanced level of honesty and
intelligence."
-- Anne Wilson Schaef
The path of healing begins with awareness that
things can be different. We must be willing to open to the potential, the
possibility for change.
We also need to acknowledge that we are not in
this experience alone, without support. The divine power of love is here for
us, if we are willing to open to receive it. Sincerely ask for help and loving
support will manifest in both mundane and magical ways.
"The healthy, the strong individual, is
the one who asks for help when he needs it. Whether he has an
abscess on his knee or in his soul."
-- Rona Barrett
Magic happened the entire time
I was in
Los
Angeles
. I had an intention, more than being with my
family for daughter Kelly’s wedding, there was healing that I felt needed to
appear.
This next tale is right out of
a movie, I asked permission from ‘him’ he said, there’s noting that could stop
you from telling the story, I said, if you told me you didn’t want me to, I
wouldn’t. so,
here goes,
bout a week before I was
leaving for LA, daughter Kelly called, we were on the phone for about an hour,,
first she took a really deep breath, “I was
talking with dad the other day, and I asked him, ‘for you to have the perfect
day on the day of my wedding, what would that look like?” I’m waiting for this one. She goes on, “He said, ‘Tell your mom, NOT TO
TALK TO ME.” I couldn’t contain myself,
I broke up laughing, then I said, “sorry, I just think
that’s the funniest thing I’ve ever heard.” Kelly agreed, there was so much
more around this story, we’ve not been together for more then 22 years. And we
had spent holidays together up until a couple of years ago. Any
way. I said, I will honor his request, no
problem.
Saturday the day of the
wedding, grandson Cole and I drive over to Kenny’s,
{he’s my wasbend} {the X thing hadn’t ever resonated with me} Cole and I talked about beings on other galaxy’s and what happens to you once you leave your body.
By the way Cole is 12 earth years, we had a great time, being there was so much
busyness going on, having a few moments alone with any
of the children/grandchildren is a blessing.
I asked Cole what he thought
about what happens when someone leaves their body, he said, “they come back
right away.” “that’s one possibility, wanna hear what I think?” He shook his head. “well, I think
that when someone, like Ian leaves his body, his soul continues to explore
other possibilities that we cant’ see on this earthly
plan, and at some point, I believe he will return.”
Cole was thinking about this, “I can see that
too. Yeah, that’s another way for some to return if they want to.”
We talked about beings on
other planets, other star seeds. He said, “It would seem unlikely that we would
be the only ones in the entire galaxy.”
Interview with Dalai Lama
"Whether one believes in a religion or not, and whether one believes in rebirth or not, there isn't
anyone who doesn't appreciate kindness and compassion."
His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama
Ok, the wedding is at Kenny’s
town home, he has impeccable taste, his place is a show place, yet cozy,
beautiful. Anyway.
Arriving, Kelly, Jo~e and
Krista were outside, this was good, walking into the house with them felt
comforting. Not that I felt uncomfortable, I felt great, excited about my baby
girl getting married.
I’m there for about an hour,
Kenny and I happen to pass one another on the stair well, with his head down, and a deep voice he says,
“Hello.” I in turn do the same, I chuckle as I
continue to the top floor where Kelly and company are putting the finishing
touches on the bride. When I get a picture I’ll send it. They looked fantastic.
Just writing this now, my chest fills like a proud peacock.
The service was magical,
everyone that spoke with me told me they had been to many weddings, never have
they felt the love they experienced today.
Those who cared to were asked to
share what they felt about the bride and groom. Kelly’s daddy spoke, he was quite emotional and eloquent, very tender, I
spoke also, as did many others. Anyway, about Kenny, someone standing next to
me said, “that was really touching, I felt his love for
your daughter.” I responded with, Yes,
how he speaks is from his heart. Well,
he heard me, and said, “thank you.” “You’re very welcome.” Shortly
after, I was headed upstairs to the bathroom, there are two patio’s, the larger
is where the service was, and the small one is on the top floor, Kenny was
heading out onto the patio, “goin out for a smoke?” looking over his
shoulder, “wanna join me?” I followed. He loaded up his
pipe, lite it, passed it to me. We sat a
chatted for a few moments. We shared the peace pipe, all’s well.
Walking down together, everyone was there as
Kelly and Donnie, new bride and groom we’re going to cute the cake, Kenny was
standing to my right, I took his left arm and put it around my shoulder.
He looked at Kelly saying,
“Take a look at this.” Kelly put her
fist to her chest, “where are the paddles.” As one would do to another who’s heart was failing. We’ll as the energy continued to move, a
circle appeared, dance music was permeating through the house, Nina grabbed me
to come into the center to dance, I did, then I turned and grabbed Kenny, he’s
smooth, his parents were ballroom dancers. He went from looking as though his
face was wax, to a light hearted daddy of the bride.
The day was coming to a close,
everyone was saying their good by’s . .
.
Kenny was in the kitchen, I
went in to say good night, we hugged, and he kissed me on the lips. OK THEN. . . from don’t talk to me, this is good.
Tuesday, I’m with son Ray, his cell rings, he
chats for a few moments, then says, “she’s right here, you ask her.” You guessed, it’s Kenny.
“Why don’t you give the kids a
break and come over for dinner tonight?”
“I would love to, I have an
issue, I don’t like to drive at night.”
“That’s not an issue, I have a
second bedroom, you can sleep over.”
Ok, this is beyond anything I
could have dreamt up.
I arrived around 4, we sat and
talked about what we’ve been doing the last 20 + years.
He has a cat, she’s really tiny, maybe 6 lbs. and she 6 or 7 years old. He tells me she
doesn’t like anyone but him, that she hisses. Even at
Kelly, I shake my head, cat come over to me rubs her
head, then her entire body on my leg. I scoot down, sitting on my heals, hands
folded between my legs, she comes over to rub up against my hands, I put my
finger out to feel her, wow, she feels like Mink, and has the same color. I say
nothing, Kenny doesn’t say anything, nothing needed to be said, her actions said it all.
It’s around
6:30
, dinner is ready, we walk into the dinning
room, he pulls out the chair for me, “sit.” He walks out of the room, I continue to
stand, he put music on, Bonnie Rate. Can’t remember
the song, yet it was so apropos for what was occurring at that moment, when
Kenny walked back into the room, I grabbed him and we danced, what a trip,
right out of a movie.
After dinner standing in the
kitchen doing the dishes, talking about what just happened. We agreed, this was
a fantastic movie scene We laughed.
Around 10, I said, I’m done
for this day, we said good night, had a great night sleep, mission
accomplished. Yeah.
IT IS NEVER MY RESPONSIBILITY TO:
Give what I really don't
want to give.
Sacrifice my integrity to
anyone.
Do more than I have time to
do.
Drain my strength for
others.
listen to unwise counsel.
Retain an unfair
relationship
Be anyone but exactly who I
am.
Conform to unreasonable
demands.
Be 100% perfect.
Follow the crowds.
Put up with unpleasant
people.
Bear the burden of another's
misbehavior.
Do something I cannot really
do.
Endure my own negative
thoughts.
Submit to overbearing
conditions.
Meekly let life pass me by.
Journey of Love
Talking - From the
'Prophet'
"You talk when you cease to be at
peace with your thoughts;
And when you can no longer dwell in the solitude of
your heart you live in your lips, and sound is a diversion and a pastime.
And in much of your talking, thinking is half murdered. For thought is a bird
of space, that in a cage of words many indeed unfold its wings but cannot fly.
There are those among you who seek the talkative through fear of being alone.
The silence of aloneness reveals to their eyes their naked selves and they
would escape.
And there are those who talk, and without knowledge or forethought reveal a
truth which they themselves do not understand.
And there are those who have the truth within them, but they tell it not in
words. In the bosom of such as these the spirit dwells in rhythmic silence.
When you meet your friend on the roadside or in the market place, let the
spirit in you move your lips and direct your tongue. Let the voice within your
voice speak to the ear of his ear;
For his soul will keep the truth of your heart as the taste of the wine is
remembered when the color is forgotten and the vessel is no more."
Unknown author
